Happiness

The so desired happiness has been the main pursuit of many, from the period of Ancient Greek, and now is the aim of scientific studies and gurus texts and books.
We all want to be happy. And being happy has many different meanings to each individual.  according to World Health Organization, in 2030 depression will be the most common disease in the world, so happiness has never been so studied.

There was a research conducted by some psychologists from the University of Illinois and Virginia that considers happiness the most desired goal for most of the people, even more than being rich or “going to heaven”.
So if there is this desperate need for happiness, there is also a whole world of things trying to offer you ways to get to it.

We can see that everywhere, from medicine prescribed without a real need, to self-help books, it seems like everyone has a good promise for you to be happy.

The concept of happiness

According to Luiz Felipe Pondé a philosopher, a major historical change happened in the understanding of this term.
"In Greek philosophy, being happy was not fulfilling the desires, but do the necessary to not suffer from any kind of passion, seeking then a state of serenity.”
Very different from our modern times, where in our culture, unfortunately, being happy means quite the opposite of it – looking for the fulfillment of your individual wishes at any cost, in an endless pursuit for pleasure.

We go through all kinds of experiences, the pleasant and the unpleasant ones. They are all part of our existence; however, those who understand happiness as a state of never-ending pleasure, and zero frustration are doomed to live dissatisfied.
According to Pondé "happiness inside a market system also disturbs many people, as the notion that I am only happy if I earn a lot of money and buy a lot of things, generate a kind of emptiness, you acquire something, get satisfied, pleased for some time and soon you are after a new acquisition".

Besides the rampant consumption nowadays, the social obsession of being happy goes through the need of being “yourself”, work in what you love, seek things that have to do with you, but it is not always possible to leverage authenticity all the time.
Living in society means making choices and making concessions, but not meaning that you have to let go of your desires. The important thing is to have balance.

Science

A study from the University of Edinburgh, with over 900 pairs of twins has concluded that there may be a genetic predisposition to happiness, but it is important to remember that this becomes very relative, as our posture, behavior, and choices throughout life also play an important role in our wellness.
So not only a matter of genetics but also how we tend to deal with things that happen to us during our life. How we are able to adapt, change and strengthen ourselves.

"The brain is endowed with neuroplasticity, which means that we can reorganize experiences and develop a more positive and realistic mentality of things," says Louise Maria Malmström, English psychologist.

What do we want?

The kinds of desires that we pursue tell us a lot about the chances that we will have to be happy.
According to Tim Kasser, a psychology professor at the University Knox, in Illinois, there are two types of values and opposing objectives: the extrinsic ones and the intrinsic ones.
The former are all those in which the focus is placed on external things, which depend not only on us - succeeding, making money, having a good appearance and being popular. The intrinsic is the psychological needs that say only about you, how to try to be who you really are.

Those people who are more focused on extrinsic values are less happy, suffering from depression and anxiety and having less energy and vitality on a daily basis.
We can observe how extrinsic things affect us doing a simple exercise. During a week just watch how you feel when you are going to post something online, how you react to other posts, when you see who liked something from you, and you will realize that those things relate to self-esteem and are extrinsic things.
Then observe intrinsic things, like a walk with your friends, drawing, dancing. Watch your thoughts and feelings in those moments. Probably you may feel more connected to life, less anxious and happier.

Impermanence

It is important to focus and understand that nothing lasts forever. "The pain exists and it is not a question of denying it, but if you are aware of impermanence, bad events will not bring them down." Nun Zentchu Sensei, from São Paulo.
We must see happiness related to something that is much more inside not in what happens to us.
We should not deny the inconvenience caused by the bad times, but we must enjoy the good, knowing that both are temporary, and accepting this brings peace.
The journey is individual and there is no ready recipe. "We should not worry about getting away from the pain, but about following our feelings, even if it means suffering, "Pondé says.

For some to be happy means to change jobs, from home to country, for others to buy a refrigerator or a tv. Everything is very relative and does not necessarily mean the idea of abandoning everything, there is not a formula that works for everyone. Self-knowledge is the key.
When you are well with your questions and choices, it is easier to be happy.

Flow

There is a state called – state of flow. Positive psychology has this name because it works with affirmative emotions, strengthening our personal resources.
The concept of flow was developed by the Hungarian psychologist Mihaly Csikszentmihalyi.
Flow is an experience where we reach our zone of excellence and we do not see the time passing, it is that sensation of dedicating yourself to a pleasurable activity, to be totally absorbed by it and the time simply does not exist, you flow.

Finding the activities that lead you to this state is important, be it a painting, a sport, a walk in the park, what matters is to use your internal resources to discover the activities that lead you to that state of flow.

Simplicity

We also need to dream about what is possible, instead of fighting with life because it does not bring us what we want.

Valuing the present moment and not waiting for the end. To lessen the anguish, we must focus more on the present moment, instead of always keeping our head on future goals and plans. In Buddhism, happiness involves being aware, putting your consciousness in what you are doing

"In meditation, you bring the mind to the present. Do not fight with the thoughts, but you perceive them and turn your attention to the present moment" says the nun Zentchu Sensei.

It may be an excellent training,  instead of expecting happiness only from the great achievements, we must find it every day, in simple things, like observing the waves, having a cup of coffee or reading a good book.

Attraction

For some writers, therapists, gurus, quantum physics joins spirituality to explain how the Universe works. We are made of atoms, and atoms are energy. We attract what vibrates at the same energy frequency as ourselves.
If we vibrate at a low frequency, we feel sadness and life only gets worse.
Everything we observe with focus is energized and drawn into our experience. Manifesting sadness, dissatisfaction, we channel our energy in the same frustration.
What happens is that we attract even more situations that make us unsatisfied.
When we act in the opposite way, being very happy, accomplished with what we already have, being grateful, the Universe understands that we like what we have, and then sends more of it to us, in an amplified way.
Each one on an individual journey, like I mentioned before, each with a particular quest, but the most important thing is to know that we are responsible for what we attract, and for our happiness.


"Embrace only the song that echoes the tune of your soul. ☥"
~Luis Marques, 20.03.2015

Reference , Prata, Liliane - Em busca da Felicidade, Revista Cláudia, Agosto 2016